The Importance of a Name

Choosing a name for our kids has been very important to Matt and I. We put a lot of thought into it, and make sure that there is a story behind it.

The day after we were sealed to Tyce, Matt was able to give him a fathers blessing in which he gave Tyce his official name that would be kept in the records of the church. Taelynn received her blessing in August, just a couple months after she was born. (I didn’t have a blog then, so you get to hear about both of our little miracles.)

The name we chose for Tyce is Tyce Mitchell Kabua Bosen. 

A lot of people have asked me where we came up with the name, so here is your answer. Since I was in elementary school Ty has always been my favorite boys name. I knew that my first boy was going to carry that name. When I think of the name, I think of power and culture. I also feel that it is a gentle, yet manly name. I could see a baby with that name and I could see an adult with that name. I didn’t want it to be Tyler or Tyson or any of the other names that could be shortened to Ty because that just wasn’t fitting. I just wanted Ty.

When I was living in Russia, one of the girls that I was living with was telling me about her friend Tyce. I had never heard that before and I really liked it! I still had the ability to say Ty, but it added some more… character. So I locked it into my name bank.

When Matt and I got married, I had three girls names and 3 boys names. I gave him full veto power if he didn’t like one, but to my surprise he only vetoed one of the names. It worked out though, because I wasn’t fully invested in the name he did veto. But, we did know that our first girl would be Taelynn and our first boy would be Tyce. I’ll explain her name in a little bit. So now that we knew their first names it came time to middle names.

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Originally, we had a different middle name picked out for Tyce. I won’t reveal it here, because I still want to use it in the future, and I want that person to be surprised when they find out our child is named after them. ūüôā BUT, when I was on the plane to Arkansas, I was sitting next to my dad, and he had a way about him that was making me feel so at peace. Here I was, in the most stress filled situation, and my dad was completely calm and supportive; knowing exactly what to say. He never questioned Matt or I, but instead, trusted our instinct and the spiritual promptings we had received. After we landed, my dad went to gather our luggage and I was standing back with Taelynn. I called up Matt and asked him what he thought about making Tyce’s middle name Mitchell (My dad’s name is Glade Mitchell). He said he loved it and that was that. The name Mitchell to us stands for hard work, integrity, love, trust, devotion and spiritual strength. Those are all things we hope for Tyce.

As we got closer and closer to the finalization day, I couldn’t help but feel like something was missing from Tyce’s name. It didn’t feel complete. I was talking to his birth mom one day and learned more about her last name Kabua.¬†The name Kabua comes from¬†Kabua the Great, renowned paramount chief. To date, the two RMI presidents (Republic of the Marshall Islands), are grandsons of Kabua the Great.¬†Well,¬†being part of a culture that loves genealogy, I thought this was really neat. So we gave Tyce the second middle name, Kabua, in honor of his birth mom. The name for us stands for love, sacrifice, family, culture and heritage. ¬†And just like that, his name felt complete.

We can’t forget my little Taelynn Fedelina.¬†When I was younger, I used to baby sit a little girl named Taelyn. It was such a fun time. She was the most ADORABLE baby, and I loved the responsibility of taking care of a baby. Her family was incredible and I only have happy memories when I think of the time we lived next to them. That name has always stayed with me because it was a time that I learned responsibility and I guess you could say, my motherly instinct came out.

BUT, what made it even more special is that it carried the name Lynn as part of it. My mother’s middle name is Lynn and she then gave me the middle name Lynn. So I guess you could say it is tradition. On top of that, my grandma’s name is Carolyn. Both my grandma and my mom are two of the most influential people in my life. From them I learned service, love, gratitude, friendship…you name a good quality and those two woman possess it.

But, while we are going off the importance of the name Lynn, we have to add Matt’s grandpa into the mix (because not everyone can be named after my family! hahaha!) Matt’s paternal grandpa is also named Lynn. Talk about packing meaning into a name.

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Fedelina, this name came to me shortly before I gave birth. I knew that Taelynn was already named after my mom and my paternal grandma, but it didn’t feel right leaving out the third most influential person in my life, my Grandma Esther, my maternal grandmother. She grew up catholic and as such, has several names. I tried to memorize them once, but I don’t fully remember all of them (she didn’t remember all of them right away either, so I feel a little better). One of her middle names is Frieda. However,¬†my grandma is Spanish, so if you were to say Freida in spanish it would be Fedelina. How beautiful is that?! So of course, it had to be. So, Tae may hate us when she has to fill in the little bubbles to write her name on tests in the future, but I feel like it will all be worth it. Those names stand for courage, love, charity, honesty, virtue, devotion, love, hard work, perseverance, a little bit of stubbornness but most of all family. (I kind of sound like I am checking off the Young Woman’s theme…)

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I don’t think there is anything more powerful¬†than watching all these strong influential men in your life, standing around your child in a wall of protection, giving a blessing to my most precious gifts. Both times I have been able to experience this with my children my heart has burst, as I feel at peace that my kids will always be protected and watched over. I don’t know if all of you men know the gentle power you have. I sincerely thank you, for honoring your priesthood and using it to bless and protect my children.

Matt gives the most beautiful blessings, and I am so glad that I have friends and family members that were smart enough to record them. I can’t wait to let Taelynn and Tyce listen to them in the future. As a mom, there is something so heart warming about listening to your husband, the father of your children,¬†talk to God and ask our Heavenly Father to grant these blessings on our babies. What is more attractive than a father that loves his children beyond comprehension?!

I felt like I was in the movie, The Lion King, after the blessing was finished. Matt lifts our children in the air, presenting them to the ward, and you can hear a rumble of happiness and “awe’s.” You can bet that puts a proud smile on my face.

Of course a celebration isn’t the same without food, so afterwards we went to our house and served up our take on Cafe Rio salads. (Anyone that knows me, is that even a surprise?)

Blessing days are my happy days! Family, Food and Perfect Babies! Thank you all for helping us celebrate our wonderful children!

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Families can be Together Forever

“Families can be together FOREVER, through Heavenly Fathers Plan. I always want to be with my own family, and the LORD has shown me how I can.”

The day that made all other days have very little meaning. When Matt and I got married and sealed in the temple it was exciting and beautiful! But, we agreed, the day we got sealed to Tyce put that day to shame. There is something so magical and spiritual about being sealed to a child. It is completely different from birthing children. NOW,  that isn’t to down play the importance and magic of biological children. The day we had Taelynn, I thought my heart would burst. But, I didn’t have the panic and urgent feeling with Taelynn, because I already had the peace that she was sealed to us for eternity. Well…technically I didn’t even know I felt the peace until I felt the urgent longing that I experienced with Tyce. (Any of you other adoptive parents out there, feel free to help me figure out a better way of describing that feeling! I can’t find the right words to emphasize the importance.)

I know not everyone readying this is LDS, but just so you know, we believe that you can be sealed to your family after death. Death isn’t the end. When we get married in the LDS temple our biological children are automatically born in the covenant or sealed to us, but when we adopt, we get to go back and seal that child to our family so that our spirits are sealed for eternity.

***Get ready for picture overload***

 

April 16, 2016 – This day felt like an eternity away. In Utah, there is a law that you have to wait 6 months to finalize an adoption. That means that we couldn’t get sealed to Tyce in the temple or even have his baby blessing until he was “legally” ours.

The 6 month wait felt like an eternity. But, let’s be real here, it was closer to 7 months because of court dates. We knew it was going to be hard and that the adversary would be fighting against us, but goodness, even with that foresight, it was a painful fight. Satan knew exactly what would cause us the most stress and anxiety and he hit it right in the bullseye. But, despite all of that, WE MADE IT!

The night before, we had the beautiful experience of going through the temple with my cousin, Kaela, for her first time. It was such a perfect way to bring the peace for the rest of the weekend. Plus, it was perfect because that meant she could be apart of Tyce’s sealing the next day.

Matt and I woke up early on Saturday and started getting everything packed up. There was a feeling of peace circulating the house. Just thinking of it now, feels my heart with this eternal happiness. The babies woke up and were so happy. We got them dressed in their whites and they looked like little angels.

We got Tyce a tea leaf Lei in honor of his birth family. I love them with all my heart and it didn’t feel right unless we made sure they were a part of this day. He made the best faces when the leaves would touch his face. Tae was a little jealous and kept trying to put it around her neck or in her mouth…

My mom met us at the Provo City Center Temple, so she could help us take care of the kids while Matt and I got everything in order. We walked into the temple together and temple workers greeted us with such excitement! They all knew us by name and eagerly welcomed us inside.

We wanted the ceremony to be very intimate and so we just had our close family come, and it worked out perfectly. I don’t want to go into much more detail than this, because it was one of the most spiritual experiences of my life. Nothing I write will give justice to the feelings of joy and peace that we felt. I will say, that when my mom and the temple sisters brought Tyce and Taelynn up to me and Matt, nothing could hold back the happy tears that fell from my face, as I began to understand the true meaning of Christ’s love. I looked at the faces of each of the people that sacrificed so much to be there with us, and I knew that this was my heaven.

We walked out of the temple doors a forever family. What excitement we felt,  to see our loving family waiting for us. It truly is like walking through the gates of heaven. It was a true blessing that our family could make this experience as big of a deal physically, as it was to us in every other aspect. We will forever appreciate that.

***FUNNY SIDE NOTE- My mom was with the kids the whole time we were in the temple. They have a nursery area for families that are being sealed. Well, the temple sealer called down to have her bring up the kids, so she was racing to change their diapers. As she was changing Tyce’s diaper he decided it was the perfect time to see how far he could pee, and low and  behold, he made it all the way to his face, getting it in his eyes, mouth and every other crack and cranny. Let it be known, he hasn’t peed on any of us since he was a month old.  My mom decided not to tell any of us until after the ceremony, which means Matt and I got our fair share of pee kisses.

At this point, the kids were beyond exhausted. They had already skipped two naps, yet somehow were as happy as could be. BUT, as you look through all the pictures and see Ty’s head down, just know, he is fast asleep. Nothing we did could keep that kid awake. He didn’t even get jostled when we would move him around and put him in different positions for pictures. There were a few moments he would randomly wake up and give us a few perfect, happy smiles, and then two seconds later his eyes would roll back and he would fall asleep again. It was impossible not to die laughing.

 

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There is a reason I have always tag Tyce’s pictures with the hashtag #thejourneyofty (The Journey of Ty). He is on quite the journey, touching lives along the way. So many people have had a hand in bringing him home to us. My eyes are pouring, right now, as I think back on the last 7 months. I think of my parents who dropped everything when I called them that beautiful Sunday in September, without any warning, to tell them that our baby boy was being born right then. Right away, my dad jumped online to look at plane tickets for us and canceled all of his plans for the week so that he could fly to Arkansas with me so that I wasn’t alone. My Aunt Dana, who was so excited, she picked us up from the airport in Kansas City, and took me shopping for baby clothes, and then drove us the 6 hours to Little Rock and back. Matt’s mom, who came and spent a week and a half with me and the kids in the NICU, after my dad and Matt had to go home, and then helping me fly home. And then of course to so many of you who donated help to us after we encountered some unexpected costs. Some of you I barely knew, but I think and pray for you all daily. Thank you for being so in-tune with the spirit and answering our prayers so that we could get home. You all have a special place in my heart. And this is just a few of the people that are apart of Tyce’s Journey. Really, that doesn’t even brush the surface. Tyce’s Journey has been a remarkable one. I can’t express the appreciation I have to you all for believing in him and in us.

After the temple, my parents took everyone to Los Hermanos in celebration. Because let’s be honest, nothing says celebration like one of their fresh (virgin) Pina Coladas. It was so much fun to sit and visit with everyone. What a blessing it is to call these people my family. The legacy that they have paved makes me want to be a better person. Their example, love and compassion brings me to my knees. Family to me, isn’t just bodies to take up space, but spirits that come together to mold us as individuals. I am so lucky to be a part of a group of people that holds family above all.

Thank you everyone that helped make this day unforgettable. I can’t say enough how truly blessed we feel. What a reaffirming testimony that, “families can be together forever.” I’m sure glad I get to spend forever with this bunch.

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***I need to express my love and gratitude to both Emma Matheson Photography and Kurns Photography. Emma had taken our family pictures the week before we adopted Tyce. When she found out we had another addition, she immediately volunteered to take new family pictures for us with our handsome little guy. AND THEN, the wonderful Courtney Kurns volunteered to help take pictures for us at the temple, right after getting arm surgery, so we would have pictures to commemorate this day. I love you both and am in love with my forever keep sakes you gave me! Thank you! 

Picture Credits:

Emma Matheson Photography

Kurns Photography

 

We’re Finally Finalized! The newest Bosen

There are very few reasons going to court is a good thing. My car accident last year… not so much! Yet, April 13, 2016 will be forever marked as the day I looked forward to appearing in court, because it meant that Tyce is¬†legally my son.

I was so full of emotion yesterday that I had to wait until today to be able to express the gratitude and love I feel in my heart. My mom worded it perfectly:

Who said you can’t have a fantabulous sunshiny day when it’s raining? Today a judge bound all of the bazillions of heartstrings that I’ve had wrapped around my little peanut, to an official, legal document! Tyce is not just tied to my heart for eternity, but LEGALLY my grandson! I love you, Aubree, Matthew, Tae, and Tyce!¬†¬†‚Ä™#‚Äéadoptionrocks‚Ĩ¬†‚Ä™#‚Äéthejourneyofty‚Ĩ¬†‚Ä™#‚Äéthereignoftae‚Ĩ¬†‚Ä™#‚Äéfamiliesareforever‚Ĩ¬†‚̧

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I’ve been waiting for so long to get my picture with the Judge!! My kids may be looking in different directions and Tyce’s drool may be slowly dripping down my shirt, BUT This is exactly what I wanted.¬†

All morning, Tyce was giggles and smiles. He woke up earlier than normal and just wanted me to cuddle with him. He kept looking up at my face and stroking my cheek. It was like he knew it was a big day. Taelynn on the other hand, was my somber queen. It was like she could feel the intensity and impact that this day would bring. During the whole court proceeding my normally busy bee sat on my moms lap and quietly waited.

I don’t know what I was expecting, but finalizing an adoption was a really neat¬†experience! I felt like I was doing Mock Trial all over again, except it was real, and I wasn’t trying to put someone in jail. My awesome mom came to celebrate with us and help us watch Taelynn. We¬†met our Lawyer,¬†K. Paul MacArthur from MHM Law Offices, at the Provo court house. I didn’t know I could like lawyers until I met Paul MacArthur. He brought us into the court room and we went and sat up front in the defendant chairs.

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Our wonderful Attorney, K. Paul MacArthur from MHM Law Offices

We talked for a little bit and he gave us some of the questions he would be asking us. Then, the Bailiff walked in¬†and¬†said, “All rise for the Honorable Judge David Mortensen.” And in walks our judge with his fancy black robe.

Matt and I each got our own microphones to answer the questions. I went first and was asked questions along the lines of, “When did you get married? When is your birthday? When was Tyce under your custody? Why did we want to adopt?… ect.”¬†¬†Then it was ¬†Matts turn. He was asked, “Do you agree with everything your wife said?” :/¬†really? haha

At this point, Judge Mortensen declared us fit to be parents legally and lawfully to Tyce. He said that they used to have him stamp the legal documents to make it official, which made it really dramatic, but now it is all electronic so he just has to click a button. BUT for our benefit, when he clicked the button he yelled out, “BOOM!” He then gave us a document with the Fourth District Court Seal, where he had written out his thoughts on adoption. I will keep this document forever. In one part he quoted a book entitled The Soul of Adoption, by Catherine E. Polman, saying:

“Adoption is an exquisite grafting of humankind. For both the birth and adoptive parents it is a defining transition, a deliberate lunge beyond childbearing. For the child it is permanent relocation accompanied by the hope of increased opportunity…Successful participants learn to comprehend the needs of everyone involved and afford those individuals freedom to choose and grow in ways consistent with their unique personalities and talents. Boundless and unwavering love can develop. “

I love this because my family has been grafted like an Olive tree. My family tree now includes branches grafted into the trunk making it bigger and stronger. It may not have all grown from one seed, but the new additions work with the old and grow from each other. However, they cannot grow strong and tall and straight without proper care and love and devotion. But just like any tree, the branches are all different shapes and sizes. (Thank you for letting me get cheesy for a moment).

Afterward, the Judge was gracious enough to let us take some pictures with him to mark this historic day for us. And just like that, Tyce is legally a Bosen.

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Tyce Mitchell Kabua Bosen

 

To celebrate, we went to the BYU Creamery for some Ice cream. We were a little notty and let our kiddos have a bite because it was a special day. Taelynn may have gotten a little carried away…. Tyce on the other hand, not a fan!

 

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***A special thanks to MHM Law Offices. They were the most honest, helpful, caring people and I am so glad we got to work with them.