Down and Dirty

A party isn’t a party unless you are rolling around in the mud! It’s natures natural exfoliant. Although, it hurts a little more than a sugar scrub…

For Matt’s 26 birthday, we celebrated by running The Dirty Dash in Soldier Hollow. It was an absolute blast! Our team was called the “Birthday Suits!”(in honor of Matt). Somehow that was interpreted to mean short shorts and cut t-shirts. We were joined by my brothers and our friends Jared and Dalton. My parents and Jared’s adorable pregnant wife Whitney came along for the party and to play with our kids while we were on the course.

Now for any of you that are wondering, this is an out of shape persons Spartan race. We gave up trying to run after the starting line went straight up a muddy hill, although, to our credit, we did go the full 10K. We trekked though mud, swam through swampy water, crawled through tubes, climbed up rope nets and walls. We were shot at with water cannons, thrown over slides of doom and dropped into questionable pits. BUT we survived.

There was one particular challenge that almost ended my game. I always thought I loved water slides until I met this particular death contraption. They set it up to make you believe you are racing to the top with three of your friends, when in reality, as soon as you go over the side you are shooting to your demise. Matt, Camden, Jared and Dalton went first. I could hear their screams, but assumed they were screams of Joy. Ethan, Baylee and I were next. Being the competitive family we are, we didn’t hold anything back. I grabbed onto the rope that helped you climb the air filled steps and shimmied my way to the top. I could see that Ethan and Baylee were neck and neck with me, so rather than setting myself up to go down the slide on my rear, I just dove head first. I regretted that decision immediately. Now, when these huge blow up slides are set up at fairs they are dry and you land in a soft pad of grass, however, in this case they were more like a muddy waterslide that dropped off into rocks. I was going so fast, there was no possibility of stopping and I landed in what I would describe as a baseball slide, belly flop. My body skidded along the rocky floor a good several feet, knocking the air completely out of me. My legs and belly looked like I got in a fight with a tiger and the tiger won. To be honest, I don’t even remember if I won or not.

Right after us, another group of guys went down and it ended badly for them as well. They had blood coming out all over the place! We weren’t surprised when we saw several ambulances make their way up to the spot as we were farther along in the race.

After that challenge, our energy was basically gone. But, by inspiration, my dad and Taelynn met us on the course to cheer us on! Both Taelynn and Tyce were completely fascinated by all of the dirt and grime. And I am happy to report, it didn’t stop them from diving at Matt and I, wanting us to hold them.

Finally, after “racing” 3 hours we walked across the finish line! A glacier cold shower, some peanut butter cheerio squares and a big drink of water later, and we were ready for a nap!

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But, instead of sleeping WE HAD TO KEEP CELEBRATING! We went to CPK for dinner with Whitney and Jared and then made a pit stop at Roll With It for dessert. It was DELICIOUS! At CPK this lovely old man couldn’t take his eyes off of Tae and Ty. He literally came over to our table 2 different times to tell us how adorable they were and to pinch their cheeks. A little weird…but I can’t blame him because I think they are the most perfect beings to ever be on this earth!

I dare say, it was a pretty spectacular birthday, wouldn’t you agree Matthew?

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